"Give me not love, not money, friendship or faith... give me truth."

-

This is it, the climactic end to innocence, youth and dreams.

Approaching my eighteenth birthday in a singular loneliness that I've forced upon myself out of confusion and frustration of life and time wasted 'til now. Of daily problems which should not exsist, with simple solutions but not the resolve to approach them, I have decided to wash my hands of this exsistance.

My youth is slipping from my fingers, physically in any sense as I can no-longer call myself a child-like mentality anymore. It just doesn't feel right to refer to myself among my generation of peers.

My dreams I dissolve as I make, with help, a reality from hence-forth. They shall no-longer be referred to as 'dreams' but merely visions, glimpses of what I /WILL/ make my future.

-

Over the next few months, I'm breaking down my life. Piece-by-piece to weed out the distractions, un-nessisary and redundant. I fear, I will hurt people in this process, I fear it and hate myself for it, but to each must persue happiness, time is the only factor that has any meaning in this and for me it's seemed my ethics of not hurting peoplel have only served to get in the way of my own.

"Try to become not a man of success, but a man of value" - Albert Einstein

I choose, actively and sound in mind to live and act simply, to take things on a face value and act accordingly.

"He said. 'Son, when you grow up will you be the saviour of the of the broken, the beaten and the damned?'" - Black parade, My chemical romance.

I miss my father, a great deal more than I ever imagined I would of while he was here, I believe in the person he built into me and I will try to grow and further his legacy.

-

I'm not in the best of mental states at the moment and though this will further stress me I know that in the end I will of gained a deal of peace.

No commitments.
No worries.
No drama.
As I hope to enter the wild, strong of heart, safe from conviction and self-imposed hate guiltless and free.

I will carry this path through.

-

I need a vacation.

"It is not so important where one settles down. The best thing is to follow your instincts without too much reflection" - Albert Einstien